How to Find the Right Guy – Your Husband?
Just like the insight in our previous post entitled “how to find the right woman to marry?”, the Bible encourages men and women to remain virgin and unmarried, so that they may serve God without distractions from the earthly things. However, the Lord, who is a Lord of justice and understanding, don’t want us to sin and fall into sexual immorality. He has reserved for us a gift – a marriage that is for us to rejoice throughout the rest of our lives on Earth. However, this joy of marriage shall only be achieved if we will follow the teachings and instructions of God.
This article guides unmarried ladies in searching for the right guy whom they will marry. This article also helps married woman to direct and transform their selves in to wives who bring joy to their husbands and children. For single and married guys out there, this will be their idea and knowledge to become righteous and loving husbands, who are worth to be followed by their faithful wives.
1 Corinthians 7:34-38 (New King James Version)
There is a difference between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman cares about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit. But she who is married cares about the things of the world—how she may please her husband. And this I say for your own profit, not that I may put a leash on you, but for what is proper, and that you may serve the Lord without distraction.
But if any man thinks he is behaving improperly toward his virgin, if she is past the flower of youth, and thus it must be, let him do what he wishes. He does not sin; let them marry. Nevertheless he who stands steadfast in his heart, having no necessity, but has power over his own will, and has so determined in his heart that he will keep his virgin, does well. So then he who gives her in marriage does well, but he who does not give her in marriage does better.
Now, here are the guidelines from the Holy Scriptures that lead every single lady to the right bridegroom:
The right man to marry is one who can give you independence from his parents. In reality, many married couples fail because of the inability of the husband to become independent from his parents.
Mark 10:6-7 (New King James Version)
But from the beginning of the creation, God ‘made them male and female.’ ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife,
Your future husband must give you the love and care that are due to you. He must not sleep with another woman except with you as his wife.
1 Corinthians 7:3 (New King James Version)
Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.
You are supposed to follow and submit to your righteous husband. Therefore, you must find a man who is righteous and will not lead you to sin. You must look for a husband who will love and respect you, as he loves himself and his own body. Remember that a man who is not responsible to himself, can hardly become responsible to others. Just think of a man who is a drunkard and a glutton, a person who don’t care for himself. Do you think he can be responsible to his wife and his children? Hence, it is better to find a man who has self-discipline and takes care of himself for the sake of the people whom he loves. This is a man who keeps away his self from vices and preserves his own body for the sake of others.
Ephesians 5:22-33 (New King James Version)
Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones. “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.”This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.
You should choose a man who will trust you and recognize your trustworthy.
Proverbs 31:11 (New King James Version)
The heart of her husband safely trusts her; So he will have no lack of gain.
You should search for a man who will appreciate and praise the good things you will do and show to him.
Proverbs 31:28 (New King James Version)
Her children rise up and call her blessed; Her husband also, and he praises her:
The right husband is one that is like the Lord, who promises and brings righteousness, justice, love, faith, kindness, mercy and knowledge of the Lord.
Hosea 2:19-20 (New King James Version)
“ I will betroth you to Me forever; Yes, I will betroth you to Me In righteousness and justice, In lovingkindness and mercy; I will betroth you to Me in faithfulness, And you shall know the LORD.
You should avoid guys who are full of wrath. I tell you, he will also make you irritated, and push you into hatred and will drain your patience, kindness and gentleness.
Proverbs 22:24-25 (New King James Version)
Make no friendship with an angry man, And with a furious man do not go, Lest you learn his ways And set a snare for your soul.
1 Corinthians 15:33 (New King James Version)
Do not be deceived: “Evil company corrupts good habits.”
If you don’t want to become poor, as well as your children, do not join drunkards, gluttons. Their uncontrolled spending in too much wineries and meats will dry out your wealth. Illness and sickness brought by drunkenness and fatty foods will weaken their bodies and ability to work.
Proverbs 23:20-21 (New King James Version)
Do not mix with winebibbers, Or with gluttonous eaters of meat; For the drunkard and the glutton will come to poverty, And drowsiness will clothe a man with rags.
Be with a man who has wisdom rather than folly. Wisdom brings good life, while folly brings destruction.
Proverbs 13:20 (New King James Version)
He who walks with wise men will be wise, But the companion of fools will be destroyed.
In finding anything, including finding the right husband for you to marry, you should always search first the things that will bring you to God and His Kingdom. You should see to it first that this man has love, wisdom, kindness, humility, honesty, diligence and other virtues of a man who is from God. We should not be lured by material and financial things. Take note that the wealth and riches of the fool are only temporary. But the riches and wealth of the wise grows gradually and are enduring. You may also refer to this article (How to become truly wealthy).
Matthew 6:33 (New King James Version)
But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.
Finally, remember, that these guidelines are not just mere guidelines – they are also instructions from the Lord that we shall adhere. It is a reality that good men nowadays are hard to find. But no matter how many bad guys are there in the world today, there are still a lot of benevolent people on Earth. Of course you will not find them in places like Disco bars, night clubs, wild parties and other places where bad men hangout. Try to visit the places (house of the Lord, charity offices / activities, spiritual gatherings, etc.,) where kind men go around – you will realize that there are still many good guys in this world.